The Horror of our Love
by Rufioh
Summary: Draco/Hermione oneshot. Got the idea from Griffin and because I really needed to tell someone, "It's not fair for either of us" and what better way to let out my feels than through fanfic! The title is a Ludo song, used for ironic purposes. Also, for any Alternian Trolls, this is totally a Kismesis couple! 3-


Hermione sat in the library waiting for someone. She pulled at her hair, she smoothed down her skirt, she opened up _The Art of Transfiguration_ and skimmed the first page for the hundredth time. In an attempt to not look suspicious, she had charmed her wand to light up the moment the person she was waiting for arrived, this way she wouldn't have to keep looking to the door in anticipation. Of course she did this anyway.

At a quarter to five, Hermione had half a mind to pack up and head to her dorm but, just as she was about to slid her various books back into her bag, a familiar boy with lustrous blond hair trotted in. To an unobservant observer, one might think the boy was walking with a cocky swagger. One might assume his smug grin was proof that he truly was the stuffy wanker that nearly everyone at school said he was, but to Hermione, it was a try at playing off his nervousness. She ducked into the bookshelves and broke the charm on her wand, which was blinking wildly on the table.

Behind the shelves, Hermione attempted to get the boy's attention.

"psst. Psst. Draco, over here."

The boy had heard her, but in an effort to not look suspicious or awkward, he took his time perusing each other shelf before "casually" trotting into the section where Hermione stood waiting.

"For the love of Merlin I heard you," He chastised in a whisper, "And for that matter I reckon the whole bloody library did too!"

"Sorry" Hermione said, and then whispered, "Do you think anyone suspects anything?"

"No, or at least if they do they aren't making a scene about it."

Hermione shook her head and turned away from Draco. This was a bad idea, a very bad idea. She should have never asked Draco to come here. In fact, she should have never gotten involved. She bit her lip and whispered,

"I don't think this is smart. Us meeting like this. Not here. Not anywhere, really."

"Then why did you tell me to come?" Draco said annoyed. Then he leaned in and with a sharp sneer asked, "Really Granger, why did you tell me to come?"

This got to Hermione. The nerve of him acting dumb about it all. To think you thought he had, well never mind what you had thought, you were wrong.

"Deep in thought are we?" Draco said, breaking Hermione's train of thought. Hermione gave him a harsh look and, in response, he said coarsely, "I don't mean to be brash or rushing but like you said, it's not smart meeting here."

Hermione nodded. Whether it was for her sake or Draco's, even she didn't know. Draco motioned for them to sit down and then, turning his back on Hermione, took out his wand and moved it about while saying something under his breath. Suddenly, and unbeknownst to the other library visitors, the bookshelves bordering Draco and Hermione shifted, so that they appeared to be two shelves when looked at head on. Hermione shrugged,

"Not bad."

"I know how to impress." Draco replied, putting his hands behind his head.

"Oh yes of course." Hermione mocked. Now that they were for sure hidden (and likely soundproofed if Hermione was remembering the spell right) Hermione felt more at ease. Although prior she had been fidgeting with her hair nervously, she now absentmindedly flung it off her shoulder in one graceful move.

"And you certainly know how to impress the men" Draco said smiling.

"What?" Hermione asked. Then, "oh!" when she realized what he was talking about.

He sat there looking smug, and Hermione thought about punching him right in the face, but then another part of her thought about kissing him right in the face.

It might seem foolish, but the more Hermione hated this smug little prick, the more she wanted to kiss him, to explore his disgusting pale skin, to trace every vile line. It was sickening, he was sickening.

"You're doing that thing again. You know, that thing where you don't talk for a really long time and just stare at people."

"What? No I'm not!"

"Yeah you are." Draco pressed mischievously "Here I'll show you, you kind of looked like this," and then he made his eyes wide and opened up his mouth as big as it could go.

"Stop that!" Hermione said bitterly. Draco laughed.

"Yep, that's exactly how you looked. Honest."

"_Honestly _I can't even imagine a viler person than you."

"What about the ginger? That Weasel?"

"Stop. And don't call him that."

Draco jutted out his lip, feigning hurt from Hermione's dismissive attitude.

"I was only playing."

"Well I don't like the way you play. You are annoying, rude and, well, you're just not a very nice person."

"Really?" Draco pretended to be shocked. "You really think all those mean things about me?" Hermione nodded "That I'm annoying and rude and," Draco let out a chuckle, "_just not a very nice person_?"She nodded again. "So then why is it that you snogged me last night behind the weeping willow? I mean, if you think I'm so _vile_?"

Hermione turned away from him again.

"Actually, that's why I asked you to come here." She took a deep breath and decided that whether she said it now or she said it never, it still wouldn't change how things were. "I want to, to apologize for that."

Draco's smirk remained, but now it was accompanied by a furrowed brow. "Apologize? For what?"

Hermione shook her head. "For that! It was wrong of me to…kiss you. It should not have happened. I was just so enraged and I couldn't handle it and—"

"Are you trying to tell me you were so angry that you had to kiss me?" Draco let out a curt snort.

"Yes, well. It's very confusing, even for me. But I should not have kissed you, it will not happen again."

"Oh, Is that for certain?"

Hermione didn't want to make any promise, because with teenage emotions, one could never be sure. "Yes, that's for certain."

"Oh now don't be so certain Granger. I mean you don't even look convinced yourself." Draco then leaned low and used his pointer to motion for Hermione to come near, as if he were telling her a secret. "y'know, we could make an unbreakable vow, if that'll make you feel better about it."

"Stop that Draco!" Hermione said, pushing his head away. Draco was in a fit of laughter.

He snorted again, and then looked straight into Hermione's eyes. "You know Granger, it takes two to snog." And after that dreadful come on, Draco leaned over and pecked Hermione's lips.

"What? Draco, why did you—"

Draco shrugged, unconcerned "I don't know. There's just…something about you. I want to hate you, but I also can't help but to like you." Draco leaned back in his chair. "It's foolish, yeah, but I can't help thinking about you. It's terrible."

It was terrible, Hermione understood. She felt disgusted with herself every time she thought of Draco in a romantic way. She felt even more disgusted with herself when she remembered all those harsh words Draco had said to and about her …and to and about her best friends.

"It makes you feel like your betraying you're friends." Hermione said mournfully.

"Or like you're betraying your family."

"Or like you're betraying yourself."

"Yeah. It feels like I'm not staying true to me anymore." Draco said, "Mad, huh?"

Hermione believed that yes, it was very mad. She didn't want to think about Draco like she did, it was unnatural. Draco too did not want to think about snogging Hermione, but he figured she'd never understand what he was feeling, how he felt like he was wronging his family's name by thinking about her. Still, a large part of him liked the idea of kissing her, of forgetting his name and ancestry and having a relationship with this girl. So much did the idea fancy him that he got up from his seat, walked over to Hermione and, not merely pecked, but kissed Hermione, hard. Quickly, she pushed him away, and sputtered,

"Draco, stop. Don't do that."

"Why not?" Draco asked determined. He wanted Hermione to see that he was alright with diverging away from the family name. He wanted her to think of him romantically.

"Look," Draco began, "I know you want to… and you know I want to. So why don't we-"

"Because it's not fair Draco! It's not fair to our friends, to our families. It's not fair to each other! Nothing would grow out of this! We would kiss and…possibly maybe more, but that would be it! You can't grow a healthy relationship on pure hate. It's not fair to do that!"

Hermione prayed that they were soundproofed, because if not, then she had just let the whole library know how she felt. She sat back down with a thud, for she had stood up during her outburst without realizing it.

"You must understand Draco that I want more from a relationship than just hate."

Draco considered saying something, then closed his mouth, then opened it again to say,

"You're…absolutely right. I hate you and you hate me, and there isn't a thing that can be done about it." He sighed, "There isn't a thing that can be done about it, is there?"

"Just go Draco." Hermione said, her head on the table. With a disturbed face, Draco stood. He straightened his robes, combed his hands through his hair, then took out his wand and parted the shelves. He said no parting words to Hermione, but simply trotted out of the library the same way he had entered. She was right, it wasn't fair and that was it.


End file.
